One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt,seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "Whatsetting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma."
And they say blondes are dumb...
A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."
The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
"It'sjust too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of theshower, "honey, what do you think the neighbours would think if I mowedthe lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumour.
Ipray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patiencefor his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him todeath.
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manual."