Offender : You!
Offense #ZD101FB608 : In Front Of The Computer TOO LONG!
Details of Offense :
During our routine sweep of the Internet we, the Internet Police,
have discovered that you have been on your chair in front of the
computer TOO LONG!
You are HEREBY ORDERED to clean up that pile of cups, cans,
wrappers and papers on your desk (yes, we can see you - sit up
straight!) and after you have logged into the real world for a
minimum of ten minutes you may log back on to the Internet.
Failure to comply may result in loss of reality, carpal tunnel
syndrome, and the requirement of a larger chair. The timer starts
NOW! Get off your butt - you'll thank us for it later.